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As well as sharing experiences with our friendly online community, registered members are able to contact our experienced online team. The Centre is staffed during office hours and the online team aim to reply within 24 hours.

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Picture of Topic  'Today I am feeling' - managing emotions


Topic 'Today I am feeling' - managing emotions

Share how you are feeling and swap tips for managing stress with other members and the online team

  • 186 conversations

Husband with aggressive prostate ca

Started by Anonymous on 26 June 2017 at 09:45

Today a week after husbands diagnosis I completely broke down at work. I have been advised to sign up to Maggie's to get emotional & practical support. My husband is only 49 & I know cancer is no respecter of age but he's had no symptoms at all & it's only by sheer luck that we discovered he had it. We're still trying to process what will come next, the after affects of the surgery & how we'll cope with it. I hope someone will be able to give me some reassurance & advice.

Comments (3)

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  • From Anonymous
    29 June 2017 at 17:55

    Hello My wife and myself have recently been through what you are going through ( me being diagnosed and my wife supporting me) and its a total overload of information, i keep wondering what my wife is going through, as all i have to do is go along with the treatment, but I often find myself " sneeking a peek" at my wife and thinking , how on earth is she being so strong, but the truth is she is being torn apart with emotions and there is nothing I can do about it appart from staying possitive and reminding her that I am a survivor, and we will both get through this together, we visited Maggies in Dundee and got a lot of support and help from them, so now you have made contact with Maggies you are never alone, it helped me starting a conversation on here as being able to talk definately helped me, so maybe that will help you too, please feel free to ask any questions you want, as you will find out that there is a great big Maggies family out here just waiting to help Chin up Ray

  • From Anonymous
    26 June 2017 at 22:34

    Hi It must be very difficult for you both. It's great you've sought the support of Maggies so early on. I've found them very supportive. My husband was diagnosed with advanced prostate which had spread a year and a half ago. He's on hormone zoladex, had Chema and radiotherapy in that time. Inspite of the diagnosis he is very well, still pt working and physically active. We have significantly improved our diet to an anti cancer one and found Penny Brohn centre in Bristol with its residential holistic courses incredibly helpful. It is hard but the progress in treatments mean it is well managed for some time, in my husbands case we are told it is likely to be many years. His PSA is undetectable currently having been very high at the outset. Like your husband he had hardly any symptoms. It takes time to process this for you both and I wish you well with it and with your husbands treatment. Dia

  • Picture of SusieQ
    From SusieQ  
    26 June 2017 at 13:56
    Edited on: 26 June 2017 at 16:26


    It's a difficult and challenging time when someone you love is diagnosed with cancer - and it can sometimes take a few days or so before the shock of the news hits home.

    There's a blog I wrote a few months ago - 'how to cope with a cancer diagnosis', and in it I mention that shock and loss of concentration that accompanies such news. It's particularly hard as your husband had no symptoms, so the news will have come out of the blue, in a way.

    You may have read this already - but the information 'Surgery:radical prostatectomy' from Prostate Cancer UK, gives some useful aftercare advice.The charity also has an online community where you can read (and join in) other's experiences...

    ...However, what is more difficult to prepare for in advance, is the emotional impact of the surgery and it's potential side effects. This can feel a lonely place - there's a sense of relief that something can be done to treat the cancer, but you're both then understandably anxious about what mught lie ahead afterwards.

    There is lots of support and advice out there - you may find the urologists provide aftercare support and clinics. It's also worth considering joining a local prostate cancer support group, and finding out more from people living with prostate cancer about the practicalities, and emotional/psychological aspects. If you live near one of our Maggie's Centres, then you and/or your husband would be welcome to drop in - for help, support and practical advice.

    In the meantime, I hope other online members who have been through something similar, will ad their own voice of experience I think that may help too...

    Please do get in touch with Robyn or myself, if we can help in anyway, too - even if it's simply to feel supported as you go through the treatment and afterwards...

    Warm wishes


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