See what's happening in the Community

You are not logged in.   Log In

Meet the team

As well as sharing experiences with our friendly online community, registered members are able to contact our experienced online team. The Centre is staffed during office hours and the online team aim to reply within 24 hours.

Psychologists and experts from other Maggie's Centres and partner organisations also facilitate some group and individual sessions.

Picture of Topic  'Today I am feeling' - managing emotions


Topic 'Today I am feeling' - managing emotions

Share how you are feeling and swap tips for managing stress with other members and the online team

  • 186 conversations

Lost .. heartbroKen. He is gone,

Started by Anonymous on 06 February 2016 at 22:15
Edited on 06 February 2016 at 22:16

Can't explain properly  it goes lost my partner 2 months ago .... feeling hurt lost lonely angry sad depressed  it goes on and on .... all the questions going round and round ..... he went so quick so sudden ..why. ... didn't have time to say anything  to sort anything  to do anything my deepest despair now breaking down all the time ... every day every second is a struggle can't cope ... and no one can help I've been everywhere for help friends family professionals  

.. no one can help ... I walk around in shock every day .... it hits me like a ton of bricks .... every second of every day .... don't want to be here. ...... 

Comments (5)

latest | oldest

Displaying 5 comments

  • From Anonymous
    20 February 2016 at 11:57

    Hi, firstly I am so very sorry for your great loss......when I was reading your post he first thing that struck me was, how lucky to have been with such a special person, and what wonderful memories you must have. I have five children, and when they were very small, my partner left me to bring them up alone, my eldest son is disabled, and my life has certainly been challenging. I would have loved to have had someone who would care for me, that special person, the person you had. I know I have no idea how you are feeling, but believe me, I have had the darkest of times......I think he will always be there with you, always, and he would be saddened to see you like this, you must continue for the person who loved you so very very much. Lots of love Pauline x To

  • From Anonymous
    19 February 2016 at 23:17

    Hi Jessica

    So sorry on the loss of your Tony,I am 17months down the line of losing my beloved husban Tony and like you he was my life and we were together every minute of everyday.

    I kept a diary and put down my thoughts every day and how much I was missing him,when i sit and read it now,it gives me comfort,although all this time down the line I still have days feeling as you do now,and just wanting him so much.

    I don't think there is a time limit on grief,at first I was really numb,then the can't believe I'll never see him again, wanting him back everyday,forcing myself out of bed. 

    I found i was as lonely with other people as on my own the hole in my heart was always there and still is.

    I hope that maybe one day things will get easier and you can think back as I do somedays of the lovely days and how glad I had such a great love and although the pain of losing him was so bad,I would never have been with out having had that love.

    I am thinking of you and feel your pain.


    Maureen xxx    

  • Picture of SusieQ
    From SusieQ  
    08 February 2016 at 16:02
    Edited on: 08 February 2016 at 16:17


    Grief is one of the most painful experiences we human beings ever have to face. Those beginning months after losing someone can cause a great sense of yearning ...searching for them everywhere, and yet knowing they're not there. These might be classed as the 'pangs of grief', although they feel even more painful than that in a way.

    Anger too....anger possibly at the hospital, or the unfairness of the situation...or sometimes even at the person themselves for not being there anymore.

    It is a case of getting by hour by hour, as you rightly observed...I was talking with a newly bereaved person recently, and we both observed that it's like being lost at sea. In the beginning, you may not even be able to see dry land or it's about holding onto a 'virtual' lifebelt, till the waters feel less choppy. At the moment - it's a case of survival. You won't be able to focus on 'getting over it', and nor should you...

    Seek the company of others if you can, even if you don't feel like communicating. You're in a dark place, and you may need others to shine a light for you, just now...

    I'm aware Robyn has sent you a personal message, so do check your inbox. I encourage any other online members who can identify with this initial part of loss and bereavement, to add their experiences, so that you're aware that the pain will become more manageable...but not yet...and this is the hard part...

    Thinking of you today...

    Warm wishes





  • From Anonymous
    08 February 2016 at 15:17

    Just want to smash everything  up .... so angry so tired of feeling so hurt. . So depressed  so lost .... 

    I spent every day every  minute with Tony now there's nothing I'm trying to keep busy but I have  nothing to do I clean first thing in morning I've sorted out old cupboards  etc.... can't see past another hour let alone another day like this 

  • Picture of Robyn
    From Robyn  
    07 February 2016 at 08:55

    I dropped in online unexpectedly over the weekend and saw your message -  I have written you a private message which you will find in your inbox. I know other members will also want to know that your post hasn't going unanswered

    Best wishes


Displaying 5 comments

Registered Office: Maggie's, The Stables, Western General Hospital, Crewe Road, Edinburgh EH4 2XU   Registered Charity Number: SC024414
The Maggie Keswick Jencks Cancer Caring Centres Trust is a company limited by guarantee   Company Number: SC162451